The Excellence of Waiting

The wedding bells are ringing across the countryside. The day is here! The wedding is about to begin. The bride has prepared herself for this moment and cannot be more ready and shining in brilliance than she is now.

Marriage is a beautiful, wonderful gift that the Lord has given us. But oftentimes, we must wait for that marvelous day to come. For some it can take years of endless waiting and questioning. For those (like me) who are still waiting, are faced with a question of our own: what am I to do until that day?

I have asked this question numerous times, and thankfully, the Bible details out for us what we are to do. Fear not, the answer is neither convoluted nor the hard-and-fast ‘you must become a missionary!’ rule just because you are single. The answer is simple, but not always easy. Here are three points for those truly want to honor the Lord, and their future husband, in their time of waiting.

1. Focus on Your Spiritual Walk

“You, however, continue in the things you have learned and become convinced of, knowing from whom you have learned them, and that from childhood you have known the sacred writings which are able to give you the wisdom that leads to salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.” (2 Timothy 3:14-15)

Preparing your heart and soul for marriage starts long before you fall in love and begin to plan the wedding day. 

First you must know what you have been taught. Knowing the traditional Sunday School Bible lessons is much different than understanding and studying all of what Scripture has to say. You must immerse yourself daily in the Word to keep it in your soul. The book of Deuteronomy tells us to write it on our hearts and keep it on our minds continually (6:6). You cannot do this if you do not first know it. Start a Bible reading schedule for yourself, or find one online or in a book. You do not need to read through the Bible in a year, but instead make sure that each day of the year you are in the Word. 

One way to engrain it into your heart and mind is to sing Psalms and songs that are taken straight from Scripture. Sing along to the music and work hard to memorize the words. Sing them as you work or clean to continually remind yourself of the truths of God’s word.

Second, pray often. 

“Devote yourselves to prayer, keeping alert in it with an attitude of thanksgiving.” (Colossians 4:2)

Cultivating a rich study and prayer life while you are single will carry into wedlock and bless you, your husband, and your marriage. Growing closer to the Lord will never return void, and He will give you the patience to wait until that day. Pray often for your future husband; before you go to bed and when you arise in the morning. Pray that the Lord will grant him strength to get through the day, whatever it might be, and pray also that the Lord would bring you together. 

Praying for him will make the waiting more bearable, and exciting as well as you prepare for the future.

Third, find contentment in the Lord. If you are not content where the Lord has you right now in life, then you will never be truly happy with marriage either. It starts in our hearts and affects how we see everything. For you, every day could be just another dreary day of waiting, but that is the wrong way to look at it. The Lord has blessed you with everything you have right now. If you are still at home, enjoy the time spent with your family.

The Lord’s plan may be for you to be single for the rest of your life. This is a hard truth to swallow, but something necessary for all of us to consider. Finding contentment in Christ will make your life, even if it means singleness, joyful. If you are not content in life, beg the Lord to give you contentment, no matter what is going on in your life.

Consider what Paul says in 2 Corinthians about being content: “Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Corinthians 12:10)

2. Focus on Serving Others

“Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor.” (Romans 12:10)

“For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.” (Mark 10:45)

The call to serve can be easy to ignore, but it is an important part of the Christian walk. You do not need a specific talent or gift to serve others. Devote your time to others; find joy in helping and serving. You will be blessed, and those around you will be blessed by it as well.

Do you love to be with kids? Offer to babysit for young families at church, or volunteer for the nursery.

Enjoy cooking or baking? Take a meal or a delectable plate of cookies to shut-ins or an elderly couple. Take some time to talk to them. Ask how the Lord has grown them throughout their lives. The time spent listening is of invaluable help! They can impart wisdom from experience that you may not have.

Do you knit? Teach a younger girl. Although it may not seem like it now, younger girls will always look up to the older. Be a good example, friend, and mentor. Both of you will be helped by the time spent together.

There are numerous different ways to serve others, and yours may be more unique than others, but it is still available for use. 

3. Prepare Yourself For Marriage

“An excellent wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels.” (Proverbs 31:10)

What do you want your future husband to find when he meets you? Hopefully, you strive for the above quote from Proverbs. This does not mean you must be perfect (who is?), but instead striving to be all that God has commanded of you.

A man will be immeasurably blessed if you have done the work ahead of time and prepared yourself for being a true help-meet. Can you cook and bake without Mama’s oversight? How about laundry? Can you successfully run a home by yourself for a day…or a week?

I know that there is more to marriage than cooking and cleaning, but this is a good start.

Being able to keep a home is a foreign concept in many families of this day and age, but the biblical precedent is still there. Prepare yourself and find joy in it! Your future husband will love you for it!

How is your heart? Are you keeping it protected and not allowing it to run away with ideas and thoughts that are unnecessary and will never be fulfilled? Zealously guard your heart to be able to present it whole and blameless to your future husband. Your heart is a treasure, treat it as such. Entrust it to the Lord and rest in the assurance that He will keep it and never hurt it. Trust that the Lord has a wonderful plan for you, even if it isn’t what you would plan for yourself.

Guarding your heart also includes purity. Are you keeping yourself pure for your future husband? God has commanded us to remain pure until marriage, and it is a wonderful gift to be able to give your future husband. Strive for purity in your heart, soul, mind, and body.

Reread the quote from Proverbs. What can you do to further adorn your soul with excellence?